Someone very close to me is going through a very difficult time.  I’ve prayed for her, supported her, and been there for her.  I’ve listened to her and cried with her.  I have come closer to feeling her pain than I ever ever want to.  And I’m honored when she says that she trusts me; I am glad that God gives us wisdom that we can share with others on this earth.  Yet, the very exact thing I keep telling her that she needs to not do—she does it, anyway.  I strongly believe that she could get through this difficult time a million times faster and a thousand times easier if she’d just do one thing consistently.  Yet, even yesterday, she blatantly ignored this advice.  It pains me to see her make unwise decisions—decisions that are not helping her, but rubbing harsh salt and acid into her reopened wounds. She doesn’t see the pain and damage she’s inflicting on herself when she makes these decisions.  I love her.  I want the best for her.  And I don’t give her advice based on my desire for her to do what I’d do, but based on my desire to see her whole again—restored, refreshed, wiser, and determined to spread God’s love to others with her story of His might and comfort.  And I know that she is a “free agent” and an adult who is allowed to make her own decisions.

Still: it hurts me when she doesn’t make the wise choice, yet continues to tell me that I’m the only one who she really trusts and who really supports her.  I feel as though I’m being told a lie over and over again.

I do the same thing to God over and over again. When Jesus was speaking to multitudes, He said, “Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take out the speck that is in your eye,’ when you yourself do not see the log that is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take out the speck that is in your brother’s eye” (ESV: Luke 6. 41, 42). 

How it must pain my Savior when I don’t take His advice!  How He must ache to see me thrive and succeed at spreading His love and truth!  And Oh! how I must ignore His many many warnings and suggestions to do things in a way that would make my life better, easier, and full of more love and peace and truth!  He longs for me to make the decision to be at total and all-the-time peace about my future.  He delights in me when I decide to choose kindness over bitterness and selfishness.  He is thrilled when He can love though my hands, feet, and words.  And here I am: Hurt that someone would act as though they trust me and then ignore my counsel.  Yet, I do the very same thing time after time to my Savior, who I trust, admire, adore, and long to be even closer to.  I am not lying to God when I tell Him that I trust and adore Him.  I am not lying to Him when I tell Him that He is the most supportive and trustworthy One.  I mean every word.  Yet, my actions betray my heart, at times.

I am thankful that God chooses to see me as His: perfect, beloved.  I am thankful that God speaks to my heart when I start to become irritated with a brother or sister in Christ who is failing in ways similar to or different from the ways I fail.  Furthermore, I am thankful that He shows me the right path and reminds me which choice is the one that honors Him and blesses others.  I am no where near perfect, but I can attain a consistent habit of checking my own eye for debris before trying to help another person remove the log in their own eye.

Lord, forgive me when I am unloving toward others.

Furthermore, I pray that God would give me wisdom to help anyone who comes to me asking for advice; I pray that I am given an extra measure of patience, clear thought, and communion with God so that I might speak with wisdom, in kindness, and in love.  I pray that the abundance of Love that God pours over me may be, in turn, poured out upon all who seek guidance so that they are granted Grace.  May I also be able to be a safe place for them to come in order to find comfort when they make a painfully good decision or after they make an unwise decision.