Something mentioned in the sermon today triggered some thoughts about giving.
Maybe it’s possible to give too much of one’s self.
Maybe there are moments in our life when it is more beneficial to take a break from being outwardly focused.
Maybe, just maybe, giving to ourselves can benefit others, too.
Maybe some people give to others so that they can ignore what is going on inside of themselves.
Or, maybe it’s just me who has these thoughts.
Let me be clear: Giving is good. God intends for us to share and give to others. He commands us to love one another. There are many ways we can express love for fellow members of the human race. We can give of our time or our money; we can help with physical labor; we can listen when someone needs to talk or ask about things going on in their life to show that we take an interest in them; we can hug someone when they need comforting. These acts of love are all beautiful. I witness them often and feel very blessed that I am simply able to witness this kind giving because I know that God’s love is spreading when my friends or I are on the sending or receiving end.
We all know that pushing one’s self too much can result in exhaustion. We’ve seen mothers who desire to be super-mothers do this.
There are plenty of people we see who focus so much on others that they never get the attention or recognition they need.
Oftentimes, people pour out onto others so much that they are too dry to be of any good to anyone: unable to help or assist others.
What I’m worried about is that some of my beloved fellow human race members give to others so much that they neglect themselves; they neglect taking care of their own spiritual, financial, and/or emotional needs.
It’s sort of a way to distract ourselves from the problems we need to deal with. Ignore those problems; maybe they’ll go away. Or not. Sure, giving helps us feel better and, in many cases, it can be the cure for a deeply-ingrained problem or issue we have. But other times, we give to other so we can distract others or ourselves from our problems. I know I have done this many times and I can think of one specific period of time in which I did this. It was terribly painful, but the people I was around had not one clue of the terrific screaming going on in my soul. I needed to allow myself to be poured into; I needed to take some time to focus on my spiritual health, but I refused to do so. Focusing on others allowed me to ignore my serious and painful issues. I was an emotional wreck. As much as I wished someone would have had the discernment to pull me aside to talk about my issues, I tried to distract their attentions by pointing at others. It worked like a charm.
I see other friends doing this, but I feel God doesn’t want me to address them. So, I pray. Perhaps that’s what others did when I was wearing those distracting shoes. If so, I’m thankful. If not, then I’m glad God has wisdoms beyond our comprehensions to give us the healing we need in our souls, hearts, minds, and pocketbooks. 🙂