” ‘My Lord and my God!’ Thomas exclaimed.” *John 20.28
Doubting Thomas. Most of us have heard of him. Some of us have been called a “doubting Thomas” or have perhaps called someone a “doubting Thomas” –mostly in jest, of course. The story goes as follows: Thomas’ friends told him that they’d seen Jesus after the resurrection. Thomas, then, said that he wouldn’t believe this unless he, himself, touched Jesus’ scars. Days later, Jesus appeared to Tommy and his friends and told the doubter to touch His hands and His side. At this, Thomas was exclamatory–in a good way. “My Lord and my God!” he said.
I can’t help but think about these words–partly because the journal I decided to work through, today, prompted me to do so. Also, because I feel that, in some way, I understand this moment he shared with The Christ.
Thomas had thought he’d lost a man whom he admired: a friend, a confidant, a mentor. Mostly, though, he’d lost his lord–the man whom he followed and served for the past chapter in his life. Upon finding that his friend had now really become his savior, I believe he was taken aback. At that moment in Thomas’ world, his Lord had become his God. This is not to say that Jesus had lost the title of “Lord” in Thomas’ eyes. The title of “God” was simply added to the list of what Jesus was to Thomas.
How often my God presents Himself in new ways! He adds more dimensions to His Personhood. I love it!
I’ve experienced this same phenomenon, if I may call it such. I know how Thomas felt in this scene. I understand. God has been my Friend and Redeemer for twelve years–since June 23, 1996, when I decided I’d follow Him. Of course He’d redeemed me; He’d forgiven me of my wrongdoings and had guided me through the storms and pretty-weathered days in my life. He’d been there with me. I always knew this, even during times when it felt that He was “with” me from very far away. But recently He miraculously healed my heart of eight or so years of pain and bitterness. And by “miraculously,” I mean instantly and completely– so completely that I continue to discover ways that this love has pricelessly impacted my past, my present, and my future. I’ve always believed that God performs His miracles completely.
This causes my heart and my lips to express thoughts similar to those of Thomas’:
I’d like to keep in mind, though, that God has always been everything …to all of us. In our amazing brains we may know that this is the case. We may have read about it or heard someone talk about these various ways God relates to us. Our brains and hearts don’t always seem to have a conference, though. It seems they forget to consult one another and share what they have. It’s a good thing we have experience to teach our hearts what our minds already know. As I’m growing and recording new experiences in my story, I’m really learning what it means to have God as Redeemer, Friend, Comforter, Confidant, Guide, and Healer. Although the process is sometimes difficult, the results are indescribable and more than worth being determined to survive.
What is God to you? What titles should you add to the list of His Holiness?
Thank You, my Savior, God, and loving Holy Spirit, for being my everything–and for showing Yourself to me.
A humble worshiper,
Rebecca