I’ve been thinking about beauty a lot, lately. Of beauty, there are different types: physical, spiritual, aesthetic, musical… this list could perhaps continue. It is probably because of recent events in my own life that I have decided to look around and figure out this whole thing about beauty.
First, let me reveal something truly horrible about me. I pay attention to the outer appearance of people. Maybe, at times, even more than the average person does. (I got to thinking about this when I read a blog by indie artist Tara-Leigh Cobble.) This is not to say that I think a person who is not up to my standards in attractiveness isn’t of value or worth. Sometimes I’m trying to figure out where the person comes from–their histories, their hopes and dreams, their struggles– while other times I’m being a cold, hard judger-of-books-by-their-covers. Lately, though, I have been attempting to pay attention to my thoughts when I’m–let’s just say it–sizing people up based on appearance. I try to ask myself, in some sort of an attempt to love them, “What is beautiful about that person?” I pay attention to their actions toward others and toward me, their devotedness to parenthood or relationships of other sorts, their passion for Christ (or lack thereof), and other life’s passions of theirs. Many of these abstract things are reflected in a person’s exterior–their facial expressions, their physical gestures, their warmness toward others. In performing these exercises of attention, many people around me have been elevated from the “pretty” to the “beautiful” status. Others have gone from “okay-looking” to “beautiful.” In many ways, this is the first time I’ve really began to appreciate people. (This may have something to do with the fact that I am around many people who are easy to appreciate. I hope I can carry on this act when I go back to work, this fall!) And while I do feel horrible for letting the whole world in on my secret grading of other people, I am also very glad that God has allowed me to see the beauty that He has created. There truly is beauty in His creation. I LOVE IT!
Perhaps a second terrible thing about me: I care a great deal about what I look like; I don’t feel as though I’m straight-up vain, but I’m probably pretty close, sometimes. I struggle, at times, with finding the balance between arrogance and humility: confidence. I’m not overly obsessed with my skin-deep beauty, but I do like to try to be presentable and try to accept compliments which indicate that I have, indeed, succeeded in this endeavor. But what is truly beautiful about me? I’m a person who pays attention to things people say to me; according to people I trust, I make people around me feel warm and I am friendly. According to my personality profile, people enjoy being around me. I personally attempt to make people feel safe when they’re around me–that they can be themselves in my presence–while also encouraging them to go for being a better version of themselves–especially students and mentees. I’ve often answered the question, “Do you care about what people think about you?” with the answer: “No, but I do care about what people think about the way I treat them.” If I think about it, my answer is a sort of oxymoron because caring what people think about the way I treat them does, in fact, mean that I care about what they think of me. My actions reflect my person. But, I have to go back to appearances. I’m a visual person. I appreciate art, sunsets, photography, and the fact that, as I am writing this, I am watching a roof is being constructed, trellace by treallace, across the way from my living room window. I appreciate a good hair day, expertly-applied mascara, a well-covering foundation, and a blemish-free chin (which is not the case, today). I don’t feel there’s anything wrong with appreciating such things, unless I take it to extremes by saying that only people with these qualities are of worth.
Donald Miller may have said it best in his book, Searching for God Knows What. He says this: “…there is nothing wrong with being beautiful or being athletic or being smart, but those are some of the pleasures of life, not life’s redemption” (p 75). I love this line. (And I love Miller’s writings in general.) I’m very thankful that we are not redeemed by our beauty (or our athletic prowress or intelligence). I’m glad that we can both appreciate the skin-deep or canvas-deep beauty of someone/something, while also fully grasping the deep, meaningful, eternal beauty of someone/something.
Oh, my beautiful Lord, thank You for the beauty of Your creation–Your people, Your sunsets, Your trees and flowers. Thank You for allowing me to see these beauteous things and what is deeper within them. Help me to always remember that You see beauty in everyone and help me to see that beauty. Please, Lord, use me to help others realize that You are the source of beauty–a beauty they should seek and hold onto. Thank You, Friend, for a beautiful day and for beautiful friends with whom I can share it. In Your name I continually pray…